Cutie Q
by Janeway-or-the-Highway
Summary: When Q loses his powers while in the form of a small child, it isn't exactly a pleasant experience for him or the Enterprise crew.


Captain's Log, Stardate 44417.3. The Enterprise has been sent to the planet Bontos 4 to assist the colonists with minor system repairs. This planet is said to be more beautiful than Risa, but I will be staying on the ship for the time being and taking my free time here.

* * *

Jean-Luc Picard was sitting in his large quarters drinking a cup of tea when a flash of light lit up the room. He blinked and looked up to see a man with a Starfleet captain's uniform and a devilish grin.

"Q," said the captain. "What now?"

Ignoring the captain's unfriendly welcome, Q said, "Bonjour, mon capitaine!"

"What do you want, Q?"

"Nothing really. I was in the sector and decided to stop by and say hello."

"Whatever you want to tell me, do so now or get off my ship," Picard snapped, knowing all too well that Q wouldn't just stop by to say hello and then leave.

"Get off my ship!" Q mimicked. "You say that too much, Jean-Luc, but I think I'll stay." He settled down on a comfy couch and began his story. The captain picked up a book and pretended to read.

"It has been an important time in the Q Continuum," Q began. "There was an annual event, though it would probably be every million or so of your puny human years." Picard glanced at Q over his book.

"It's a sort of game, like an obstacle course across the galaxy. Of course, with my skill and experience—"

Picard slammed his book shut. "Either get to the point or leave!"

"I'm working on it, Jean-Luc."

The captain was actually quite curious about this event, but kept his mouth shut.

"I won," Q continued , "and the grand prize was anything I wanted, whether the Continuum likes it," he paused and grinned, "or not."

Picard began to worry. A terrible thought had come to him. _Has Q asked to be with me for eternity?_

"Jean-Luc, you look worried."

"Ah, yes, Q. I'm worried you cheated," the captain half-lied.

"I didn't," Q said quickly. Picard looked at him with disbelief. "Well, maybe I used a little trickery." The captain nodded.

"So, what was this…reward?" Picard asked. He _was_ quite curious.

"Oh, that," said Q. "Nothing much, just ALL THE POWER OF THE Q CONTINUUM!"

Picard set down his cup of tea and stared at Q in horror. Then he looked on the bright side and thought, _at least Q isn't staying with me for eternity._ "Get off my ship."

"Too bad, Jean-Luc. You can't stop me now, because I have ALL THE POWER OF THE Q CONTINUUM!"

Then he left the captain's quarter with a snap of his fingers and a flash of golden light. Picard face-palmed.

* * *

Q was strolling down a corridor of the Enterprise when something ran into his leg. "What the—" he looked down to see a small boy.

"You're not the captain," the boy said. Q had never liked children.

"I'm not," Q said. "Why did you think that?"

"You have four dots on your collar, but Captain Picard is bald."

Q tried not to smile and didn't succeed. "Oh, okay." He snapped his fingers and half the pips disappeared.

The boy's eyes bugged out. "You're magic!"

"Well…"

"Can you change what you look like?"

"Um…yes." Q looked at the child's small, round face. "Okay," he said, "what's the harm?"

Q snapped his fingers and changed into a puppy, a green frog, and various other earth animals. The child's eyes were as big as tennis balls by the time Q was a small boy. All of a sudden, he felt his power drain. He attempted to change back to his original form, but couldn't. Q, the amazing, Q, the omnipotent, Q, the powerful, a defenseless little child!

The boy clapped his hands. "Now you can play with me!" He stopped clapping. "I don't know your name."

"Uh…I'm Q."

"That's a letter of the alphabet!"

This child was very excitable. "Yes, it is," said Q. "It's also my name."

"I'm Carter. Let's play Hide-and-Seek!"

Q had never played Hide-and-Seek, but he soon caught on. It didn't require Q powers. But he still wondered what happened.

Q quickly dashed behind the nearest bulkhead as he heard Carter say, "Three, two, one, ready or not, here I come!"

As soon as he settled down, he said, "Q, talk to me!"

The Q that our Q had been talking about (known as Q2) appeared.

"Q! What a surprise! You look so different!" He lowered his voice. "It really does suit you."

"Shut up," said Q, "You know perfectly well what happened. _You _have Q powers."

"And you don't," Q2 pointed out.

"And _you_ don't have to rub it in that you're omnipotent and omniscient and I'm not…at the moment."

Q2 shrugged. "You have to learn your lesson. This is a perfect way to do so."

"But what—"

"Oh, you know perfectly well what you did."

"Q!" said a voice. "Q, I see you!"

Q2 looked in the direction of the voice, then at Q. He chuckled and said, "Well bye, bye, Cutie Q. Have fun!"

"But wait! Don't—" Q protested, but Q2 had already disappeared in a flash of golden light.

Carter ran up said, "I found you, Q!" But Q didn't feel found at all. He felt as lost as a lone puppy in the rain, far from home.

"You can be the seeker now," said Carter.

Q didn't want to be the seeker, but decided it would better than being discovered and thrown in the brig.

But he still wasn't sure what his conversation with Q2 meant.

* * *

After one too many rounds of Hide-and-Seek, Q asked, "Why don't do something else?" He was not only sick of Hide-and-Seek; he was running out of hiding places.

"Okay, let's play tag!" said Carter.

The two were soon running down the corridors chasing after each other. Q soon felt a pain in his legs and his eyelids were drooping. Being so preoccupied, he ran straight into Commander Riker, who was on his way to Transporter Room 2. Q fell to the floor and had a sudden urge to cry. Being a child was really getting to his head.

Riker held out his hand to Q, who grabbed it and got up. Deanna Troi came up next to him. She knelt down beside Q, who was starting to unwillingly cry. "Are you all right?" she asked. "Will, what happened?"

Carter ran up and was about to tag Q when he saw what was going on.

"Are you okay, Q?"

"Q?" said Riker and Deanna at the same time. Busted.

"That's what he said his name was," explained Carter.

Riker immediately tapped his com badge. "Riker to Picard."

_"Picard here."_

"Something very interesting just happened. I think you'd better come down to Deck 3."

* * *

"What exactly happened?" Picard asked Q, still a small boy.

"I-I was walking down the corridor when the boy, Carter, ran into me." Carter had been guided away, confused, by Counselor Troi.

"He wanted to see my powers—"

"—and you couldn't resist showing off," Picard finished.

Q glared at him, but continued his story. "Just to humor the child, I took this form." He pointed to his small body.

"Then change back," said Picard, who wasn't stupid and _had_ expected something was wrong.

"Jean-Luc, I can't! The Q Continuum took away my powers!"

"Now why do you think they did that?"

"I really don't know, Jean-Luc. I wiped the Continuum of all their power, so how could they take it away from me? That's what's really annoying me," said Q, shaking his little head.

"Doesn't it also annoy you that you're powerless and stuck in the form of a child?" Picard asked. "Besides, how can you be sure it was the Q Continuum that did this to you?"

"Oh, I'm sure," Q replied.

"Why?"

"Well, when I won this game, I 'signed' an agreement to prove I honestly won and that what I got was rightfully mine."

"Ah, I see," said Picard. "You're a terrible liar, Q. The Continuum must have realized you cheated and taken away your prize."

"Um…something like that," Q admitted. "A Q friend also visited me here, on the Enterprise, to let me know that they were dumping me here."

"Now that _I_ know what happened, what should I do with you?"

"Throw me in the brig? Really Jean-Luc, you're good at that."

"No," said Picard. "I have a better idea."

* * *

"Q, you're back!" said Carter happily. Before Q could say anything, he was dragged over to a table with four other kids playing with rust colored clay. "Make something with me!" A tall kid in the corner eyed them as they sat down.

Q had been sent to the children's center on the planet where the colonist's kids learned, played, and swam in their shallow, roped off section of the ocean together. He had no other choice but to go where to captain put him. _At least it's not the brig, _he thought.

The two worked with the clay in silence. Q was making a dog, and even though he kept telling himself it was silly, he couldn't help being proud of it.

"Hey you!" a voice said. Q and Carter looked up to see the tall kid from earlier. He was looking at Q. "Who are you, Shrimpy?"

"Q," Q responded. "Not Shrimpy." He looked over at Carter to see if he knew this kid. Carter was looking worried.

"What are you making there?" the kid asked. Undaunted, Q showed what he was making.

The kid laughed. "A puppy dog! What are you, two years old?"

Q was getting a bit fed up.

"Oh, I forgot, you are!" said the kid, laughing again. He picked up Q's clay and smushed in his palms.

Q was mad now. Even in his child form, he wasn't two years old.

"Leave my friend alone, Billy!" said Carter.

"What are you gonna do 'bout it?"

Carter had a fierce look in his eyes. "I'll go kill your 'secret' pet spider behind the cabinet."

"You little—" Billy started, but then decided to go over and check on his spider and find a new hiding place.

Q's face and ears were beet red, but Carter just giggled. "Stupid Billy," he said. He then saw Q and asked, "Are you okay?"

Q nodded. "Yes," he said, though he had felt like he had been hit by a ton of bricks. Without Q powers, there was no way to defend himself.

"Here," said Carter, handing Q his piece of clay. "You can make a new one. I don't think a clay dog is stupid."

Q accepted the lump of clay and smiled. "Thanks," he said, and the two continued working.

When they were finished, Carter said, "Q, I have something for you." He held out a slightly messy clay star with the letter "Q" carved into it.

Q fumbled around with his little Starfleet uniform. He found a pocket and stuck it in. "Thanks."

Carter hugged him. "You're the best friend ever!"

Q wanted to think it was stupid, but he couldn't. It was touching, but very awkward. "Um…I have to use the lavatory." He dashed to the restroom.

Once there, he sat down and tried to analyze his mixed feelings.

A flash of golden light lit up the small room and Q2 appeared. "Hello again, Q!"

"Q," said Q. "has the Continuum made up their minds to let me go yet?"

"Yes, and no," said Q2.

Q crossed his arms.

"I'm taking you back to the Continuum, where they will then decide further punishment."

"_Further _punishment?" Q asked. "This has been awful!"

Q2 laughed. "You've learned your lesson here. We're going back."

"Alright, well I have something to do before I go."

"Say good-bye to your little friend?"

"No!" said Q and ran out of the bathroom. He grabbed a data padd from the writing table and typed a quick message into it:

_Jean-Luc,_

_Don't you worry about me! The_

_Q Continuum's taken me back,_

_so I won't need your hospitality_

_anymore. Au revoir!_

_~Q_

He then found Carter. "I'm going home now," he explained. "Do the best you can to get this message to Captain Picard, okay?"

Tears started to form in Carter's eyes. "Do you have to go so soon?" he asked.

Q nodded.

"I'm going to miss you!"

"Me too," Q said. "I'll try to come visit. I'm good friends with Captain Picard."

"Really?" asked Carter.

"Really," said Q. He then left in a flash of golden light, reflecting on his true friendship with this little boy. Carter had enjoyed his company, and had been there for him when a friend was really needed.

* * *

With Q out of the way, Captain Picard could finally lie down in a lounge chair on the beach and read a good book. Occasionally, he would look up a watch his crew act like little children in the water. Apparently, Commander Riker and—the captain couldn't believe his eyes—_Data _were having a splash fight. Riker seemed to be having a good time, even though he wasn't doing very well.

Suddenly, the water started to bubble. Riker and Data paused to see what was going on.

Q then sprang out of the water with a huge splash even Data couldn't beat, drenching poor Picard head to toe.

"Q," said Picard, shivering. "Have you come to tell me that you have your powers back and want to celebrate now?"

Q sighed. "Not exactly. The Continuum gave me back my powers, but I'm confined to the limits of the Q Continuum. No more 'frolicking around the galaxy' they say. I've come to say good-bye. I may never see you again, Jean-Luc. Au revoir, mon capitaine."

And with that, Q left. Picard turned to Beverly Crusher, who was in the lounge chair next to him. "Do you really think that's the end of Q?" he asked her.

"No," she said. "The Q we know wouldn't give up that easily."

"You're right," said Picard. "He wouldn't."

Q eventually did get back his right to leave that Continuum. Of course, it involved a tedious six months in Q prison with absolutely _nothing_ to do. As soon as he was out, Q tried to restrain himself from molesting starship captains and primitive aliens too much, but he still _had_ to have his fun…

**A/N This fanfic has been through a lot. I started it 2 years ago, before I had an account. I then abandoned it for a year. Finally, for my sister's birthday, I decided to finish it. Throughout that time there has been lots of editing, erasing, rewriting, editing, erasing, rewriting, you get the picture.**

**I will accept constructive criticism. Oh, and standard disclaimers apply.**


End file.
